A First Born Graduates

 

   A first born of first born parents, our son graduated from UMBC, with a B.S. degree in Mechanical Engineering, on Thursday. It was a joyous occasion. I reflected and clearly remembered that twenty-two years ago, my contractions were painful enough to prompt me to awaken my husband, who was scheduled to go to work that morning. Seeing the pain that I was in, my husband took me to the hospital. Eight hours later, our first born child, a son, was born. Hence, that began our beautiful journey into parenthood. I was amazed and enraptured by the sight of my newborn son. In my heart, I vowed to give our son all that I could, especially love, affection, attention, and training.

   As a first born, our son received his generous share of our attention. From kindergarten to 12^th grade, we never missed a back to school night, where we would introduce ourselves to all his teachers and would get copies of the syllabuses and book lists. His homework and academic development was a priority. We did the same for his sisters, too, yet as a first born, the expectations were even higher for him.

   My husband and I would often take our son, and his sisters, to the library during the school week. Much time was spent supervising and helping him with his homework, as we did for his sisters. I remember those days fondly, yet, my son often has a different view on those study sessions, as filled with strictness. Yet, as a result, he did well in school.

   As the first born, when his sisters were born, our son would smile adoringly at them.  As a big brother, he continues to be secure in his role of first born and the leader of his siblings. That’s the benefit, instant leadership, which our son earned throughout the years, and continues to earn.  Congratulations, son!!

By Angeline Bandon-Bibum

May 23, 2014

Mother’s Day Musings

As mothers, we know there will be days filled with love, joy, fulfillment, fatigue, and, sometimes, frustration. These emotions are all a part of the beautiful experience of parenthood. Today, mothers are thanked for their enormous efforts to care for and raise their children to be good, responsible, and productive people.

As mothers, many of us realize how hard our own mothers had to work to raise us. Hence, we understand the no nonsense approach that many mothers had to use. Mothers these days have a small, if any, support system and are faced with trying to be everything to their kids. This leaves mothers with less time for themselves for renewal and personal projects. For mothers, the bottom line is that the children’s needs normally come first.

As a mother, you try to do your best, with the knowledge, skills, and abilities that you have. Yet, sometimes we can be critical of ourselves, when normal life challenges happen. So, we mothers have to remember to be gentle on ourselves and to give ourselves a pat on the back when we know that we have really tried our best.

Trying to be a great parent is not easy. Yet, the effort of going the extra mile, as often as you can, without totally exhausting yourself, often has its rewards. Extraordinary patience is necessary to realize these rewards.

Each child is different, and each requires attention to his/her needs. There are physical needs, spiritual needs, emotional, and intellectual needs. Each need must be nourished in a positive way to obtain a positive outcome. Yet, one only has so much time in the day, and only so much energy.

I remember what a priest said during mass on Good Friday. He said "real love often costs nothing less than everything."  That’s what a mother gives real love.  It costs a lot, yet it is worth it.

Happy Mother’s Day!!

Angeline Bandon-Bibum